Harper vs Jonas Preview

I'm not misogynistic but... Are rarely the words uttered by an untroubled conscience but given the state of Eddie Hearn's main event on Friday I think most of you will forgive me for a little bit of hate towards the fairer sex in this article.

Now, I'm not against women per se, I think that they do have a right to exist and sure, why not let them vote, most of my followers on Boxing twitter vote Tory so the bar for women to vote correctly is pretty fucking low. They have a monthly reminder to vote red.

There's an argument for women to receive equal pay, that's pay the same as men's, despite a woman's work never being done. This seems to boil a lot of piss in sport. I'm more then happy to pay Ronaldo £400,000 a week with money that isn't mine but if a sporting association in a country I don't belong to pays its women well than I'll have to draw a line I'm afraid.

With the prominence of women's boxing, people are often heard to be shouting en masse "but what about trannies?". In fact, even without the prominence of women's boxing or indeed with out any particular context you can often hear people shouting "what about trannies?" because trannies are never far from people's minds. Not because people find them attractive, they just find them confusing.

Of course trans participation is a huge issue in women's sport. As a passionate advocate of women's 200m divion 2, central area sprinting, I was disgusted to find out that a seven foot behemoth of a half breed had won a race three months ago. I'm not transphobic, I have just really recently started deeply caring about womens rights. I mean, boxing is a dangerous sport, can you imagine if you let Clarrissa Shields fight other women?

I digress. On paper, Harper vs Jonas is a shit fight but that's only because it is a really shit fight. I've watched Jonas box a couple of times and if I was trans it be stroking my big swinging dick and the absolute shocking level of competition in chicks boxing. I'm not saying the pool is shallow but if you threw a baby in the deep end, it will smash its tiny skull in. Jonas has a rating of 1.810 on the much respected and accurate website BoxRec. That gives her a world ranking place of 19. If any male world champion defended his title against the world number 19 you think that was pretty shit but hearn is selling this as the first ever all British women's title fight. You stage the first every all British dogshit throwing competition and the fact that it's all British won't make it any better, it will still be dogshit.

Talking of dogs, Joe Gallagher's a cunt ain't he? He refers to his female fighters as his bitches. Not because he is a west coast hip hop pimp but that's how they are listed in The Kennel Clubs official handbook.

Talking of cunts, Anthony Fowler is on the undercard. This "prospect" (two years younger than Fury) is fighting an area level fighter which may set him up for a fight with Ted Cheeseman although rumour has it Hearn wants to save it for the 2021 Tokyo Spastic Games (paralympics - Ed).

If I had to make a prediction I'd say that Harper's girlfriend looks like a council estate Megan Rapioe but Jake thought she looks like Paul O'Grady has let himself go a bit. As far as the fight goes, I think Harper will cave Jonas' cavernous cunt in.